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Today

I was brave


Since this lockdown I have been putting videos on Facebook. Rubbish really nothing special just videos of what me and the kids have been doing to keep us entertained. Shockingly I have had some really good comments. Lots of people, friends have said they like my posts which I am really surprised at. However I really want my kids to remember this lock down time as a good thing. I want to try and create as many memories as I absolutely can. I originally video them so thst I could show them when they are older. Anyway, last night I had a really dodgy night. I was tired, grumpy, emotional and just a bit disbelieving of the situation we are in and I put the video on Facebook. I think I was overwhelmed. There is so much online to help our children thst I was panicking about which things to dip in and dip out of. Then something wonderful happened. I woke up to not one but 3 video messages from some lovely people all telling me how gokd I was and how much they loved my videos. I couldn't believe it I literally almost cried. Absolutely boosted my moral and it made me brave. I went on to Facebook and I told everyone about my blog. My secret blog that hasn't had any visitors and has just kind of been an online diary for me to track my new sober life or even not just my sober life but just my life in general. I don't know what possessed me to do it and I really didn't think anyone would look at it . But they did.... My phone kept flashing with wix telling me I had a new site visitor. Was so so nervous. I mean I ha e stuff on here about well... Obviously my drinking, my family, my mum... Everything. Not sure if my confidence has gone to my head or what. Its done now though. I am going to be brave. Today my little boy learnt to ride his bike and I learned to be brave. I stepped out of my comfort zone and I did it. I am feeling proud tonight x


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